It's hard to believe 6 weeks ago at this time, I was in the OR having surgery. It actually seems like it was a lot longer ago than just 6 weeks. Hopefully my time in chemo will feel like it moves as quickly as this time did.
A lot has happened since my surgery. I am all healed up with barely any scars. In fact I was looking at the scar from my port the other day and that one can barely be seen. Hopefully I will be able to say the same of these scars as well. I have gotten used to the ileostomy though I'm not sure it has gotten used to me! We are not always on the same schedule but I guess that is life for now. I am still tired more often than not and I don't anticipate that getting better with chemo starting next week. I must keep telling myself to embrace the nap.
Work feels like I never left. Lots of great projects to work on to keep me busy and my mind stimulated. I enjoy my position and the variety of projects I work on so work for me is something I look forward too. Plus, I got a couple new suits and outfits for work to fit with my new plump so it's fun to wear the new clothes. Of course there are days when I'm ready to pull my hair out and wish I was home on disability again but those are far and few between.
I've returned to most of my usual activities. I started back to swimming this week. I didn't drown but there were times I wish I had some swimmies on! I know it will take some time to get back where I was and the chemo isn't going to help with that. Still, I love to be in the water and if I keep that in the forefront of my thoughts, the slowness and fatigue doesn't seem so bad. I also returned to Toastmasters this week. I even signed up to do at our next meeting.
Most importantly, I feel like I can see the end of this journey. As much as I am dreading starting chemo again, it means I am another step closer to the end. Knowing the cancer is out of me makes me feel like I can fight through this chemo better than before. As much as I try to tell myself, you just need to get through the next 5 months, I am also trying to keep in balance that there is no reason to continue to live my life to the fullest during this time as well.
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